1 year with Graves Disease

1 year ago I began this journey and I still don't have a clue of what I'm doing on this road.
I won't lie and tell it was easy, because most of the time it felt like walking through hell. It was hard and it isn't over yet.
Graves disease is an autoimmune thyroid disease where the antibodies attack the thyroid and makes it to produce more hormones than necessary. 
It isn't clear what is the cause of Graves Disease and the treatment is still a try for each patient.
Over this time I read everything I could on this subject and I still feel I don't understand completely its mechanism. 
I had been on anti thyroid meds for 1 year now, different doses, still with a low TSH, but normal FT3 and FT4. As I understand TSH remains suppressed for a longer time and FT4 is a better guide. 
I've done an Eco yesterday and I seem to also have a goiter with very little nodules, don't understand yet if there's a connection between it and Graves, or it had been there long before. This scared me a little, because I'm not into an aggressive approach considering the treatment.
I would rather keep taking meds for a longer period than having to think about RAI or taking out the thyroid.
It is true that the meds affect the metabolism ,slowing it , so you gain weight and it's so hard to lose it again.
Along with the weigh gain comes the nervousness, feeling tired all the time, sleeping problems and many others not so fun symptoms.
The every 2 months tests and medical appointments still stress me. 
I want to have a remission and exit this dark pit I have been put into.


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