My writing: September story(21)

It was  a rainy September day. It had  been 5 year since I hadn't seen him or even thought about him.

And suddenly , out of nowhere, his image came to my mind so clear, all the details, small talks, like it happened yesterday.

Somehow I felt the urge to compare what was then to what is now and it seems to be 2 different lives. One mine and the other of a stranger.

It's like I was less who I used to be and more someone else and the past felt so far away.

I don't know if this had something to do with getting older, setting other priorities, dreaming other dreams. 

I don't even know which way was best,there are some regrets,painful moments, lessons I'd learnt, friends i'd made,people i'd loved.

Knowing how it is to lose someone you love, I am now grateful and I value all the people that love me, they are priceless.

I think it's normal to dream other dreams, nothing stays in the same shape and he was part of the past. A past that I'd loved and miss sometimes.
His memory hit me unexpectedly and it was so powerful and alive. There was a disturbing "what if" in my mind, challenging my thoughts.
"What if" things were different, I had been in another place, doing something different,could this had made me happier?
And I had no answer, I could only imagine a possible scenario...

It just felt strange that I thought of him when I tried to rebuild the present.... Maybe it was because of the rain.