My Writing: I don't want to lose anymore(25)

Baby, I feel like crying today. A 13th Friday and no good luck. Never thought it was going to be the day when I'm gonna lose it.

Maybe it's not only about that, it's all of the things that kept adding in the last months and today the glass was full.

You know I'm not good at good-byes, it's too painful. All I'd lost today reminds me of the most important people who aren't today with me. There will always be a connection between losing them and anything else I love.

It's not fair to keep losing when you've already lost more than you can handle. What for?

You don't need to be more powerful or be reminded what you've survived. It's something that you do every day, that's a hole you have with you wherever you go.

So baby,I didn't forget how it is to lose. I'm trying not to cry, but the tears come anyway and with them the pain I'd felt in that April day when I lost her.

I wish you didn't see me so vulnerable, but the feeling is more powerful and I know I have to express everything as it comes not hide it.

You can still stay with me so that I know I'm not alone. It means the world to me.

It's the best you can do for me, being there and let me cry over losing again something I'd loved.

I want to hide from this world for a little time, eating chocolate and you telling me jokes.

Maybe one day life will get tired of making me cry and I won't have to lose anymore something I love.