My writing:Blue December(24)

It's December again. That time of the year when everybody runs for shopping and presents like it's the end of the world.

And in this mess all I want is to have a book in front of me and a cup of coffee...

It's been a hard period since last month when I found out about Graves and begin the treatment with anti thyroid meds. 

It's been the denial and anger phase and the part when I have to stop exercising until my pulse goes under 80...

This week had been a mess, I haven't been well  for the first time I began the treatment: extremely tired, headaches. I wasn't in the mood for work or anything, all I wanted was more sleep. 

And the more I'd slept the tired I'd been... I also have that feeling that whatever I eat makes me gain weight.

I totally hate all these changes or this disease I understand so little, even if I'd read everything I could find.

I want not to be this tired and to exercise again like I used to.

I almost put into work an idea I had 4 years ago and I felt nothing of the joy I used to...

What's wrong?

The plans I had are hidden in a dark corner while I try my best to keep going.

So I'll have to go with baby steps and no plans.

I also keep missing you every day... I miss you the most!